Swinging Etiquette

Swinging Etiquette

Love Of Lifestyle ...Love Of Lifestyle ...Love Of Lifestyle ...

LOL

Swinging Etiquette

One of the nicest things about our lifestyle is that most of us relate to each other with understanding, thoughtfulness, and common courtesy; just as we ourselves wish to be treated. Think C.S.A.S.C.(Common Sense and Social Courtesy). If you employ the following suggestions and adapt them to your own situation, you should be a welcome participant.

1. BE COURTEOUS Be aware that this is a lifestyle full of insecurities, uncertainties and fears. Courteously is how we all want to be treated - with kindness, thoughtfulness, understanding and sensitivity. In essence, courtesy is our treating people the way we ourselves want to be treated. Remember the Golden and Silver rules.

2. BE FRIENDLY Whether or not you are personally interested in swinging with someone, be polite. You never know, you may share many other interests or you may meet that person again, and they may introduce you to someone with whom you ARE compatible and do wish to share time.

3. CLEANLINESS Nothing turns a person off faster than an unclean body or unfresh breath. Even if you shower and perfume yourself before you leave home, it is always a good idea.to freshen up again when you arrive at your destination. It is amazing what time to drive somewhere, stop for a bite, or whatever, can do or rather UNDO.

4. RESPECT OTHERS' FEELINGS Beware, not everyone is comfortable in all situations, Keep your eyes open for signs that your partner, as well as others, is relaxed and enjoying themselves. If someone is not comfortable, try helping them over the rough spots. Remember, you were a beginner once yourself. If it is obvious that things are not working out, remain polite and courteous; but alert the host. Keep in mind that not all people feel the same about things.

5. DON'T BE PUSHY If you are interested in swinging with someone, let them know in an inviting way; if they are interested, they will respond positively. If they are not and say "No, thank you," do not ask WHY. No amount of sweet talk or coercion on your part will change their mind and will probably work against you. Everyone has the right to say "NO" at all times, to anyone, without explanation. Do not ever forget that.

6. ONLY DO WHAT IS FUN FOR YOU Do not allow yourself to become sexually involved with anybody that you are not interested in. There is no reason to involve yourself in a scene that you are not comfortable with. You are in the lifestyle to enjoy yourself, so only do what you want, when you want and with whom you want.

7. HOW AND WHY TO SAY NO One of the basic etiquette's in swinging is the right of anyone to say "No". Experience has taught most people that everybody is not right for everybody else. Improper handling of a situation, however, can lead to a lot of hurt or very bad feelings. The swing world accepts the premise that everyone has the right to say "No" to anyone at anytime and it should be done with a simple "No, thank you". Never give an explanation, because that is what usually causes the problems and the pain.

8. ALCOHOL OR DRUGS Most of us do not use drugs, although some of us drink socially. At times, a few drinks are nice to help you "relax". Over-indulging may hamper your physical abilities, as well as offend or turn other people off to you. If you have to over indulge in order to participate in swinging, you are involved in the wrong lifestyle.

9. PRACTICE SAFER SEX It is up to us to protect ourselves as well as our partners. The use of condoms should not offend anybody.

10. ENJOY YOURSELF Most important, have a good time, act out your fantasies, explore your own sexuality and enjoy everything this lifestyle has to offer with enthusiasm, laughter and a positive attitude.

In the Lifestyle a few simple guidelines go a long way:

The Golden Rule: "NO, Thanks", means NO! Anyone (yourself included) may say no at any time for any reason, without further explanation. If you're in a situation that makes you uncomfortable Just Say No! Don't jeopardize your joy and satisfaction with the life-style - or that of your partner, by doing anything against your will.

Don't submit to guilt or pressure. Swinging is fun. Keep it that way. Disentangle yourself as quickly as possible with a firm, but gentle response. Be honest, but up-front, in order to avoid misunderstandings.

Always be kind. First and foremost. it's the proper, humane way to behave. Secondly, you may reconsider and want to party later. Keep your options open.

Everyone has been rejected at some time. If you're rejected do NOT take personal offense. Keep the encounter upbeat and light. Who knows? The person who passes up the goodies today, may want to swing with you tomorrow, or may be the key to you meeting another terrific partner!

Know your own likes, dislikes, boundaries and strengths, thoroughly. Encourage and aid others in their own explorations. Keep relationships friendly and pleasant. Always propose, never impose! Swingers feel their way through encounters in more than one way. Open all channels of communication.

Deal with jealousy head-on! It's a normal, human reaction. Learn what triggers jealousy in yourself and in your partner. Then work things out. This may mean modifying certain activities, curtailing others or finding new means of sexual expression. Festering jealousies are destructive. Seek Constructive remedies as soon as possible.

Let your steady partner know he or she is always number one! Take time to stroke their ego. Be generous with a kiss and a smile. Touch bases with each other often, so that you both feel secure. Always arrive together. Honor any and all prior understandings. Then Party, Party Party!! Always leave together.

Use common sense and courtesy. Concentrate on being kind, thoughtful and sensitive and smile. Happiness is contagious!

Respect the guidelines others set, and make your own wishes and desires clear. There should be No Surprises! If you're Bi for example ask if the couple or single you've chosen has a similar interest. Likewise, if you really object to Greek or Bondage, bring it up for discussion. Once you're all comfortable with the format, let the games begin.

Before, during and after you party, pay close attention to "Body Language." There's more to human interaction than just sexual signals, but that's definitely part of the picture. Enhance your romance by considering the total person. Learn to read the signs and you'll pick up on what makes your partner comfortable, happy, excited, and ultimately satisfied.

DISCRETION IS PARAMOUNT IN THE SWING COMMUNITY! Who you see, what you see and what you and everyone else does, MUST remain private. Never, never discuss details with anyone not intimately involved. Promoting the life-style is wonderful. Publicizing it is unforgivable. Demand absolute discretion and be worthy of the same!